LGBTI Project

5 Ways Bisexual Women Can Pursue Better Healthcare

Many individuals in the LGBT+ community face significant issues with regard to health care. For example, bisexual women face a high risk of physical and mental health problems and have a higher likelihood of experiencing violence and addiction. Discrimination is often experienced within the healthcare system. The bisexual community is fighting this, to spread education and make quality healthcare more accessible.

There are some general guidelines that may be helpful for bisexual women who are looking for quality health care. Read on to learn the five ways bisexual women can take care of their health, even while facing exceptional challenges.

Be aware of risks
Bisexual women are more likely to experience addiction, smoke, have depression and have suicidal thoughts and/or attempts, compared to other groups. Bi woman are also at a higher risk for cancer than heterosexual women or lesbians and less likely to get screening. Amy André, a co-author of Bisexual Health: An Introduction said, “Research shows that bisexuals experience more discrimination, violence, and stigma than gays and lesbians.” She believes that the fact that bisexuals have the worst health is directly linked to the violence, stigma and discrimination.

Seek quality health care
Unfortunately, it’s not possible to assume that every doctor is able to cater to the unique needs of LGBT+ patients. It is easier in urban areas, but still more difficult to find a provider that doesn’t group bisexual patients with gay or straight women. There is a list of providers in the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association directory and the Bisexual-Aware Professionals Directory. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect and compassion.

Be your own advocate
You’ll need to be more assertive at times because some doctors will ask questions that are heteronormative. If you find that the doctor assumes you are a sexuality that you aren’t, you may need to answer broadly. You’ll want to make sure that you’re giving proper information about your past and current partners, and your sexuality. Some women will find it more difficult if they live in a small community with few doctors. Push yourself as far as you feel comfortable and remember that you can request certain types of screening for your physical and mental health.

Know your financial barriers
According to LGBT+ MAP’s Unfair Price study, bi women are more than twice as likely to live in poverty than the general population, and 29% of LGBT+ women have trouble finding affordable health care, compared to 19% of heterosexual women. Women in rural areas may experience even more difficulty. It’s of vital importance to have access to affordable health care. This could mean a visit to a free clinic, Planned Parenthood or a doctor’s office that takes your health insurance.

Get the word out
Form a support system and be supportive to others in a similar position. Doing this not only positively affects your chances of receiving affordable health care, it improves your health.

Popular Misconceptions About Bisexuals

There are many harmful misconceptions out there regarding bisexuality.

These common assumptions exist in and outside of the LGBTI+ community. Bisexuality is real and it’s here to stay. Some of your friends might be bisexual (or you might be, of course) and won’t come out for fear of being judged harshly and incorrectly. It’s time that everyone is able to put these myths to rest.

Bisexuals are attracted to men and women equally

Everyone is different. Some who identify as bisexual might be attracted to one gender in a different way than they are to another and possibly much more. Others do not believe that gender matters at all when it comes to their attractions. It’s best to refer to the Kinsey scale to understand this more thoroughly. The Kinsey scale has sexual orientation displayed on a scale from 0 to 6. Zero means that a person is completely heterosexual and 6 means exclusively homosexual. We can each fit anywhere on that scale…and we won’t necessarily stay in the exact spot.

Bisexuals are in a phase before coming out as homosexual

It is possible that some lesbian and gay people came out as bisexual first, but that’s not the rule. It’s also true that some who identify as lesbian or gay end up coming out as bisexual. Sexuality can be fluid for some, just like a lot of things in life.

We’re all bisexual or we’re all not bisexual

Bisexuality is real. There are actually individuals who will be attracted to and have sex with both men and women for their entire lives. This is not everyone, though.

Bisexuals can’t have a partner of just one gender

It’s a common misconception that bisexual people will need to be involved with both genders to be sexually and emotionally fulfilled. There are many who are perfectly content having the partner they’re with at any given time and who want to be monogamous.

Bisexuals are just very promiscuous people…more than any other group

Just as with any other sexual orientation, there will be some people who are promiscuous and some who are extremely monogamous. Sexual orientation is not the deciding factor here, the individual makes the decision.

Lesbian and Bisexual Women’s Health

There is so much health information available online geared toward lesbian health. How does lesbian or bisexual health differ from that of heterosexual women? It doesn’t. Women who identify as lesbians and bisexuals are prone to the same sexually transmitted infections, urinary tract infections, and yeast infections as women who identify as heterosexual. That said, it is important to note that lesbian and bisexual women do face significantly different issues within health care, such as discrimination and uninformed medical practitioners.

As sexual orientation doesn’t affect a woman’s health, it is reasonable to then look into risk factors and common illnesses for women in general. The number one cause of death for women is heart disease. There are several risk factors that contribute to the likelihood of developing heart disease. While age, race, and genetics are not within your control, obesity and smoking are. Such lifestyle choices make a significant difference when it comes to long-term health, particularly in the prevention and treatment of heart disease.

The second most common cause of death amongst women is cancer of the breast, lung, colon, uterus, and ovaries. This is one case that research shows a significant increase in rates for lesbian or bisexual women. While research is still being conducted, it is believed that breast and ovarian cancers are related to hormone levels. It is thought that full-term pregnancies and breastfeeding release hormones that may protect women against such cancers. As lesbian and bisexual women are less likely to have a full-term pregnancy, they may be at greater risk of developing such cancers.

Of course, the greatest risk for all women is to delay check-ups and exams. It is most important to find a physician that you are comfortable meeting with regularly and speaking with openly. Women should go in for full examinations at least once a year – reach out to a medical provider and make an appointment today!

Biphobia is a Common Problem

Most people are familiar with the word “homophobia”. There are many terrible, damaging myths and stereotypes out there that remind us far too much about how common it is to hate and be ignorant. There is another form of phobia that is less spoken about and it’s fairly safe to say that many have never heard of it: It’s called “biphobia” and it comes from all parts of the human sexuality spectrum.

Not everyone who is biphobic is homophobic. There are those who believe bisexuals must be either straight or gay. It’s an unfair judgment that’s not only invalidating, but is effectively saying that those identifying as bisexuals are dishonest people. It causes them to be unjustly assessed–as if their supposed ‘lies’ stretch to other areas of their lives.

Examples of biphobic statements are:

Bisexuals are confused.
Bisexuals just want to have threesomes/kinky sex.
Bisexuality is a phase.
Bisexual women just want to get men “hot and bothered’.

Many bisexuals stay ‘in the closet’ due to attitudes from the LGBTI+ community and heterosexuals. They might try to pass as either gay or straight. Sadly, bisexuals are viewed as gay or lesbian when they’re with a same-sex partner and heterosexual when they have an opposite-sex partner. The attitude that bisexuality doesn’t exist is a dangerous one to hold.

Bisexuality is not an undecided sexuality or a phase. It’s not about being confused. If anything, it’s biphobia that’s making things complicated. Even if you’re not bisexual… When you hear someone engaging in biphobic behavior, stop them and let them know the truth. It’s best to be calm while doing this, of course…the message will be received more openly and taken more seriously that way.

If a loved one comes out to you, treat it seriously and with compassion. Don’t treat them as if they’re suddenly all about sex or they’re just experimenting. It took a lot of courage for them to come out. A little education and compassion goes a long way!

Tips for Lesbians Seeking a Love Life Boost

Do you feel a little bored with your life? Or, maybe even feel like it’s a chore? That’s not what anyone wants when it comes to sex. It’s okay. It’s normal to go through periods of time when you’re somewhat stuck and need to put a little more effort into spicing things up.

Spend time together
It’s wise not to assume things will work out on their own. You need to put some effort into creating a more satisfying love life. Mark your calendar and set aside an entire day for the two of you to explore each other completely — mind and body. Both of you may be pleasantly surprised about what you discover.

Kiss for awhile
Why don’t both of you spend a lot more time kissing, without worrying about doing anything else? Often, lovers spend a lot of time thinking about the end result. You may find that if you spend time kissing, you’ll become much more intimate and sex will be phenomenal.

Don’t become too comfortable
You and your lover need not become victims of lesbian bed death. Make sure to spend some time away from each other once in a while; make your own friends, and just socialize. A little bit of time away from each other will make you both appreciate one another that much more. Of course, this appreciation and excitement will extend to the bedroom.

Buy some toys
Even the thought alone and the decision to purchase a good toy is exciting. If you’re both inexperienced, check out some websites that sell adult toys, and communicate about what turns you on. Maybe start with a dildo, which is pretty versatile. If you decide you want to go all out and use a strap-on for sex, do that, too. It’s your choice, and that can be arousing on its own.

Pick out a good lube
This is important to use on your sex toys, but also in general. It can be rubbed in all sorts of sexy places and is even more arousing if you choose one with stimulant properties.

Massage
Incorporate some massage into your love life. Make sure to explore every inch of your lover’s body. Using lotions and oil makes it that much better. You may discover new places you both like to be touched.

Dress up/Role play
You might decide to go for some power playing if you’re in a respectful, trusting relationship. This may strengthen your trust towards each other. One person playing the dominating role can be incredibly arousing. You may also choose to use costumes and uniforms. Invite a light-hearted sense of humor to set the mood. Laughing together can be sexy…and maybe you’ve always been turned on by a woman in uniform–here’s your chance to make that happen.

Common Myths About Lesbians

Are you a lesbian tired of hearing myths about who you are and what you do?

Or, are you just curious and want to dig beneath the surface for some truth? Either way, it’s important to clear up some common misconceptions every once in awhile. Some of them can be quite damaging. Let’s look at some of the more frequent myths:

Lesbians are man-haters
This isn’t true at all. In fact, there are lesbians who love men. They have long-term friendships with men and might have a man who’s a best friend to them. It’s confusing that this myth is popular at all because it doesn’t make logical sense.

Butch lesbians really want to be men
It’s true that we all express ourselves in different ways and sometimes it happens that women wear clothing or their hair in styles that are more traditionally masculine. It does not follow that women want to be another gender. Those looking to change their sex are transsexual. Sometimes clothing style has little to do with expression and more to do with comfort.

You must sleep with a woman before you know you’re a lesbian
If heterosexuals can know they’re attracted to someone else before sex, the same applies to lesbians, or anyone else for that matter.

If you’re a lesbian this means you’re attracted to all women
Bogus. This is a myth where anyone’s concerned. Apply it to yourself. Are you attracted to everyone of a specific group?

Being a lesbian is a choice
There have been numerous types of therapies attempting to get people to “become” straight that are not only ineffective, but downright damaging. Studies have shown that sexual orientation isn’t chosen and that it’s an inborn trait.

Lesbians relationships are about sex
Not true. Lesbian relationships are often multi-faceted, involving families and emotional connections as well as sex.

Lesbians just haven’t found ‘the right man’
If anything, many lesbians haven’t found the right woman yet. Just as in any type of relationship, it takes some time to find the right partner. Lesbians aren’t interested in finding the right man because they’re attracted to women. It seems simple enough, but a lot of people find that difficult to swallow.

You know a lesbian when you see her
You might, in fact, have a decent intuition or “gaydar”, but this is not something that can be measured in any definite way just by looking at someone.

One partner plays “the man” in a lesbian relationship
Sometimes the dynamics of a same sex relationship make it seem easier to assume that male/female roles are being played, but it’s not the case. There are a lot of different kinds of lesbian relationships, butch/femme being one, but that doesn’t mean that one person is pretending to be a man.

Lesbians can’t be religious or spiritual
There are some churches that are accepting of all humans, and spirituality is a subjective experience. Unfortunately, there are some denominations that would think lesbians are living in sin.

LGBTQ Teens Engaged in Sex Work for Survival

There’s a difference between sex work that is legal and that which is criminalized, as far as protection and health-regulation goes, but it’s all work. People are doing this work for many different reasons, very rarely because they want to. It can be incredibly dangerous.

What appears to be a study that is the first of its kind, was released by an Urban Institute report on survival sex and LGBTQ youth in NYC. The study took interviews from 300 participants between 13 and 21 years of age and was done in collaboration with the organization Streetwise and Safe. The study was conducted with participants speaking to their peers, which likely made it much more effective.

This approach seems to have been a good move, resulting in straightforward and complex responses from LGBTQ teens who have taken part in survival sex. To say they choose to do this is misleading and damaging–it’s for survival; they’ve often run out of options. The main reason LGBTQ teens turn to survival sex is homelessness. As many as 50 percent of youth who are homeless or runaway, trade sex for money to care for themselves or for shelter. Forty-eight percent of transgender people who engage in sex work report that they’re homeless.

A 2007 study of LGBTQ teens in New York showed that transgender teens were eight times more likely to have traded sex for shelter than heterosexual teens and that LGBTQ youth in general were seven times more likely. More than half of the respondents of the study said they used the money from survival sex to buy food first.

Often, LGBTQ youth are introduced to this way of survival by a friend. Meredith Dank, a senior research associate at the Urban Institute believes these are relationships and circumstances too fraught to be labeled as “good” or “bad”. These teens have little control over meeting their own needs for survival and don’t have support systems, so they turn to each other as family and protection. Dank said, “They’ll say, ‘I needed a parent and I didn’t have them.’ Peers are serving that role of support they really need.”

The community ties these teens have built make it difficult for them to leave survival sex, even when they are presented with other employment opportunities. And, almost all of the youth interviewed in the study said they wanted to be able to support themselves differently. They reported they did not want to be engaged in survival sex, not even in a year and that, “They wanted a job. This wasn’t a job to them, it was just how they were surviving.”

Dank says, “What we knew was mostly anecdotal, and now we have data to share. LGBT youth are having these experiences all over the country. Whoever is passing the laws about this, we need them to know all of this.”

The end of the report includes a list of recommendations that is intended to reach social service agencies serving LGBTQ youth beyond NYC.

Common Anxieties New Intergenerational Gay Couples Experience

Intergenerational couples face anxieties related to their age differences and prejudices from the outside that can make it exceptionally difficult for their relationships to grow. By taking the obvious anxieties (sometimes they’re not apparent to either partner) and tackling them head on, differences can be deemed worthy of addressing or irreconcilable. Read on to learn of some of the top anxieties some gay intergenerational couples face.

Perception
When intergenerational couples are first beginning their relationship, they’re often concerned about the perception of others. A lot of anxieties for the couple dictate their approach to the relationship. Significant negative impacts may result from outside societal pressure.

Opportunism
Both partners in a relationship may suspect that they’re being taken advantage of in some way. For example, does the younger one in the relationship just use the older partner for their money? Or, is the older partner using the younger partner for sex, or as “arm candy”? It’s important to have this discussion with your partner before assuming opportunism is the case because it can be very hurtful if that assumption is incorrect. Of course, if it’s true, it’s a legitimate reason to call it quits.

Sexual performance
This is more often an anxiety experienced by the older partner. As men age, their sexual function often decreases and they focus on those problems. They might have concerns with performance and how their younger partner will judge them. It’s also the case that the younger man might fear they’re not experienced enough for their older partner.

Autonomy
This is more of a problem for the younger partner in a relationship. The older partner is quite often more established financially and professionally. And, they have usually been out of the closet for a longer period of time; more secure with their sexuality. At the same time, the older partner may fear that they’re holding back their younger partner when it comes to to their development and sexual experiences.

Rejection
This happens in many relationships that are new– the fear of rejection. All of the anxieties we have feed into this fear. Is the younger man experienced or educated as much as the older man? On the other hand, is the older man fit enough, with sufficient energy to keep up with his younger partner? If there’s any concern, these are important questions to explore with your partner; they can be confronted and dealt with…and the relationship can flourish.

Pansexual is a more Accurate Label for Many

Most of the time, the LGBTI+ community focuses on lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and Intersex people in conversation, etc. Often, though, pansexuals are completely misidentified as bisexual. Are you confused at all? Well, maybe you are if you’re unfamiliar with the term.

A pansexual is a person who may be attracted to females, males, transgender people and non-binary individuals.

To them, biological sex (one’s physical gender at birth) and gender identity are not relevant as far as attraction goes. The prefix means “all” or “every” in Greek.

Just like bisexuality, pansexuality is often dismissed as being a greedy or indecisive. This is not true, though. A pansexual is open to loving the person, no matter their sexuality or gender identification. As bisexuals are attracted to two sexes based on gender, pansexuals are effectively blind to gender and are attracted to others for reasons beyond it, such as emotions, personality and ideals. This is not to say that everyone else doesn’t find different qualities important, but pansexuals have a wider range of people with whom they may become attracted.

The term ‘pansexuality’ first came into use in the mid 90’s, but hasn’t been significantly searched for (on Google, for example) until about five years ago. This might be due to more recent generations being more in touch with themselves.

It can be difficult for pansexuals to know how to clearly define themselves. Some may choose ‘queer’ as a term that seems more inclusive, but it’s not exactly descriptive. It can be helpful if a celebrity decides to come out, but are they really practicing their assertion that they’re attracted to personality and not gender? It seems to be a more politically correct thing to say these days, but it’s damaging if it’s untrue. There are actually people (pansexuals) who feel this way. So, if a pansexual celebrity comes out as such, that’s great–if it’s true and not a publicity tactic.

Many pansexuals know how they differ from bisexuals; this can be a sore subject. It doesn’t seem appropriate for them to identify as bisexual when that means only including cisgender people. Rapper, Angel Haze (who has dated model Ireland Baldwin) says that for her: “love is boundary-less. If you can make me feel, if you can make me laugh… then I can be with you. I don’t care if you’re a hermaphrodite or whatever.” She says, “I’m not gay, I’m not straight, I’m not bisexual – I don’t care,” she says. “At the end of the day, I just want someone to connect with.”

Sexuality a Difficult thing for Trans People

Though most people take sex and sexuality for granted, it can be a difficult anxiety-ridden experience for trans people. First, the ignorance of the medical community has made trans people wary of how they are perceived. There are things that need to be said, red tape and bureaucratic hoops that one has to jump through to get access to hormone therapy. That is something many trans people believe helps them physically be who they feel they are inside.

Today, the trans community looks out for one another and tells the younger members what to do to survive. For trans women, one of the major issues with hormone therapy is that it often blocks patients sex drive. However, they also feel judged emotionally for wanting sex in the first place, as our society still isn’t comfortable with the female libido or female sexual expression. Sometimes these issues or the journey one has made can be things that can come between a trans person and their lover. Instead of concentrating on the other person, the ghosts of these conversations and experiences can haunt a person.

The next problem is their genitalia. Trans people wonder whether or not their partners will be understanding, interested, has a fetish or will be disgusted by how they look. These complications can cause anxiety. Also, if the person likes something but women aren’t supposed to like that thing, more confusion can be brought into the mix, which doesn’t really help matters.

When trans people are interested in someone, they have to talk to them know about their situation, which can become embarrassing. It can raise a red flag; suddenly a hook up isn’t so simple anymore. The person may wonder if the other is squeamish about seeing them naked. Though many people have felt this way, it’s a different matter when your sex organs don’t match your gender preference.

If you are going to be with a trans person, don’t automatically assume that you should talk about everything, establish some rapport first. Open the lines of communication, feel things out, and make them comfortable. Find out what they do and don’t like, tell them your preferences. It’s like being with any other lover. Just try to let them know that their situation is more than okay with you.