Bisexual – news.lgbti.org

Telling Your Family That You’re Gay

Before you think about how to come out to your family, what’s most important is that you feel a sense of acceptance in yourself about your sexual orientation and/or gender identity and your reasons for coming out. As you begin to acknowledge to yourself that you are lesbian, gay, bisexual or trans, it is very common to experience guilt, shame, doubt and confusion.

The effects of a lifetime of negative social messages, discrimination and, for some, violence cannot be erased overnight. This can be a difficult time and it can be helpful to talk to a counsellor or friend to help prepare you emotionally to come out. Involvement in a local coming out group may also help you with your own process.

Even in a climate where the LGBTI community has begun to fight back and demand rights, recognition and protection under the law, social attitudes and belief systems continue to discriminate. Although social attitudes such as homophobia and transphobia affect all of us, many members of the LGBTI community confront other forms of discrimination as well, such as racism, ageism, sexism, etc. All or some of these social attitudes may influence your coming out experience.

Although homophobia and transphobia exist in all cultures, the degree of acceptance of LGBTI identities varies across cultural and religious communities. For some of us, the loss of family and/or membership in our cultural community, silence, hostility or even violence are very real consequences to coming out. If this is your reality, you need to realistically assess the risks involved. If you decide to come out, but are concerned about your family’s reaction, you should work with a counsellor or friend to develop a plan that will ensure your safety.

Family reactions

As you begin to feel the first inklings of pride and entitlement to be who you are, you can’t help feeling that family, friends and the rest of the heterosexual world will see you as different. One of the things we know is that prejudice and discrimination do change over time and it is usually exposure to that which is different that helps to change negative attitudes. When it comes to family members and in particular parents finding out they have a LGBTI child, it is those historically negative ideas about homosexuality that first concern them.

Some thoughts that cross many parents’ minds include:

“If being gay is sick, perverted and unnatural, and my child says they’re gay, I must have been a bad parent.”

“Lesbians are treated badly in employment and housing situations and lead isolated lonely lives outside the mainstream. I don’t want my child to suffer.”

“Being trans is seen as sick and perverted by many people. How will other family, friends and work mates see me if my child is trans?”

Dealing with cultural issues

If you have strong ties to a particular cultural community, your parents may be concerned with how your coming out will be perceived by the community and how it will affect their position within it. Many individuals report that cultural values, such as not talking about or displaying emotions, get in the way of them sharing their sexual orientation or gender identity with their parents. In many cultural communities, being LGBTI is considered to be a North American problem, thus the preferred response to your coming out may be to deny your reality and to become more strict about having you conform to cultural norms and expectations. Coming out may also feel like you need to choose between your cultural identity and your sexual orientation. This is even more difficult when you experience the LGBTI community as being insensitive to your cultural identity. There are groups and associations for LGBTI individuals from specific cultural communities. They can help you find culturally appropriate information, images and supports for you and your family.

If you are coming out as trans

Although years of activism have improved the lives of many members of the LGBTI community, trans individuals are still the focus of much discrimination and violence. If you are coming out to your parents as trans, you may face challenges relating to the lack of information and positive images that are available regarding trans folks, particularly individuals from specific cultural communities. The lack of information available about trans people and their experiences is directly related to the confusion and hostility that many parents may feel when their child comes out as trans. Trans identities also lead to confusion regarding the issue of sexual orientation, so your parents may wonder whether your new gender identity also means that you are gay or lesbian. Transphobia can combine with homophobia to make coming out a very challenging and anxiety-provoking experience.

Consult the list of resources on this website for books and articles that can help you come out to your parents, as well as the list of links that we have provided for trans positive services and web sites.

Most parents want the best for their children and if they know that what’s best is to be true to yourself and live who you are, they will gradually come to accept, not only that they have a gay, lesbian, bisexual or trans child and that it wasn’t their fault, but that their child will live a fulfilling life.

Before you tell your family

Before you tell them, you need personal time to come to terms with your new self-understanding. It’s also helpful to have support from others who have gone through this process. Keep in mind there is likely at least one other gay, lesbian or bisexual person in your family tree, either from previous generations or who is currently alive. One of the fun aspects of coming out to yourself is going over your family tree and identifying those who may have been LGBTI. This is often not the case for trans folks as they are still fighting for the right to live out and proud.

With your new awareness you may discover there were clues all along that you didn’t recognize because of secrecy and shame. We often hear from individuals, struggling with coming out to their family, that they fear the news will “kill” their parents. Although it may be difficult in the beginning and your parents and family may initially reject you , most, particularly those who had a good relationship with their children, accept the news over time.

Many people who’ve come out also find that their relationship with their parents eventually improves because of the increased openness and honesty that comes with sharing this knowledge. Many also experience a great sense of relief in knowing that they no longer need to keep their true identity a secret.

It is important that you communicate to your parents that you love them, are not trying to hurt them and that, whether you are coming out as gay, lesbian, bisexual or trans, you are still the same person that they love. Consider sharing with them your story of coming out to yourself, as well as the resources that you found helpful during this time. This may include books, films, friends, allies, and counselors. Above all, be patient. Recall how long it took for you to come to terms with your new identity and give your parents the time to do the same.

There are many ways you can tell your family:

The most common first step for many LGBTI is to confide in a sibling (if you have one), cousin, uncle or aunt; one who you feel will accept and support you in telling other family members.
When you’re ready to tell your parents, you might want to start with the parent to whom you feel the closest.
Instead of telling them in person, another option is to write your parents a letter. This gives your parents time to reflect on what you have told them and decide how to respond.
When you meet with your parents, either after you’ve sent a letter, or to tell them for the first time, you might want to consider bringing along a supportive friend or family member.

5 Ways Bisexual Women Can Pursue Better Healthcare

Many individuals in the LGBT+ community face significant issues with regard to health care. For example, bisexual women face a high risk of physical and mental health problems and have a higher likelihood of experiencing violence and addiction. Discrimination is often experienced within the healthcare system. The bisexual community is fighting this, to spread education and make quality healthcare more accessible.

There are some general guidelines that may be helpful for bisexual women who are looking for quality health care. Read on to learn the five ways bisexual women can take care of their health, even while facing exceptional challenges.

Be aware of risks
Bisexual women are more likely to experience addiction, smoke, have depression and have suicidal thoughts and/or attempts, compared to other groups. Bi woman are also at a higher risk for cancer than heterosexual women or lesbians and less likely to get screening. Amy André, a co-author of Bisexual Health: An Introduction said, “Research shows that bisexuals experience more discrimination, violence, and stigma than gays and lesbians.” She believes that the fact that bisexuals have the worst health is directly linked to the violence, stigma and discrimination.

Seek quality health care
Unfortunately, it’s not possible to assume that every doctor is able to cater to the unique needs of LGBT+ patients. It is easier in urban areas, but still more difficult to find a provider that doesn’t group bisexual patients with gay or straight women. There is a list of providers in the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association directory and the Bisexual-Aware Professionals Directory. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect and compassion.

Be your own advocate
You’ll need to be more assertive at times because some doctors will ask questions that are heteronormative. If you find that the doctor assumes you are a sexuality that you aren’t, you may need to answer broadly. You’ll want to make sure that you’re giving proper information about your past and current partners, and your sexuality. Some women will find it more difficult if they live in a small community with few doctors. Push yourself as far as you feel comfortable and remember that you can request certain types of screening for your physical and mental health.

Know your financial barriers
According to LGBT+ MAP’s Unfair Price study, bi women are more than twice as likely to live in poverty than the general population, and 29% of LGBT+ women have trouble finding affordable health care, compared to 19% of heterosexual women. Women in rural areas may experience even more difficulty. It’s of vital importance to have access to affordable health care. This could mean a visit to a free clinic, Planned Parenthood or a doctor’s office that takes your health insurance.

Get the word out
Form a support system and be supportive to others in a similar position. Doing this not only positively affects your chances of receiving affordable health care, it improves your health.

Popular Misconceptions About Bisexuals

There are many harmful misconceptions out there regarding bisexuality.

These common assumptions exist in and outside of the LGBTI+ community. Bisexuality is real and it’s here to stay. Some of your friends might be bisexual (or you might be, of course) and won’t come out for fear of being judged harshly and incorrectly. It’s time that everyone is able to put these myths to rest.

Bisexuals are attracted to men and women equally

Everyone is different. Some who identify as bisexual might be attracted to one gender in a different way than they are to another and possibly much more. Others do not believe that gender matters at all when it comes to their attractions. It’s best to refer to the Kinsey scale to understand this more thoroughly. The Kinsey scale has sexual orientation displayed on a scale from 0 to 6. Zero means that a person is completely heterosexual and 6 means exclusively homosexual. We can each fit anywhere on that scale…and we won’t necessarily stay in the exact spot.

Bisexuals are in a phase before coming out as homosexual

It is possible that some lesbian and gay people came out as bisexual first, but that’s not the rule. It’s also true that some who identify as lesbian or gay end up coming out as bisexual. Sexuality can be fluid for some, just like a lot of things in life.

We’re all bisexual or we’re all not bisexual

Bisexuality is real. There are actually individuals who will be attracted to and have sex with both men and women for their entire lives. This is not everyone, though.

Bisexuals can’t have a partner of just one gender

It’s a common misconception that bisexual people will need to be involved with both genders to be sexually and emotionally fulfilled. There are many who are perfectly content having the partner they’re with at any given time and who want to be monogamous.

Bisexuals are just very promiscuous people…more than any other group

Just as with any other sexual orientation, there will be some people who are promiscuous and some who are extremely monogamous. Sexual orientation is not the deciding factor here, the individual makes the decision.

Biphobia is a Common Problem

Most people are familiar with the word “homophobia”. There are many terrible, damaging myths and stereotypes out there that remind us far too much about how common it is to hate and be ignorant. There is another form of phobia that is less spoken about and it’s fairly safe to say that many have never heard of it: It’s called “biphobia” and it comes from all parts of the human sexuality spectrum.

Not everyone who is biphobic is homophobic. There are those who believe bisexuals must be either straight or gay. It’s an unfair judgment that’s not only invalidating, but is effectively saying that those identifying as bisexuals are dishonest people. It causes them to be unjustly assessed–as if their supposed ‘lies’ stretch to other areas of their lives.

Examples of biphobic statements are:

Bisexuals are confused.
Bisexuals just want to have threesomes/kinky sex.
Bisexuality is a phase.
Bisexual women just want to get men “hot and bothered’.

Many bisexuals stay ‘in the closet’ due to attitudes from the LGBTI+ community and heterosexuals. They might try to pass as either gay or straight. Sadly, bisexuals are viewed as gay or lesbian when they’re with a same-sex partner and heterosexual when they have an opposite-sex partner. The attitude that bisexuality doesn’t exist is a dangerous one to hold.

Bisexuality is not an undecided sexuality or a phase. It’s not about being confused. If anything, it’s biphobia that’s making things complicated. Even if you’re not bisexual… When you hear someone engaging in biphobic behavior, stop them and let them know the truth. It’s best to be calm while doing this, of course…the message will be received more openly and taken more seriously that way.

If a loved one comes out to you, treat it seriously and with compassion. Don’t treat them as if they’re suddenly all about sex or they’re just experimenting. It took a lot of courage for them to come out. A little education and compassion goes a long way!

Pansexual is a more Accurate Label for Many

Most of the time, the LGBTI+ community focuses on lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and Intersex people in conversation, etc. Often, though, pansexuals are completely misidentified as bisexual. Are you confused at all? Well, maybe you are if you’re unfamiliar with the term.

A pansexual is a person who may be attracted to females, males, transgender people and non-binary individuals.

To them, biological sex (one’s physical gender at birth) and gender identity are not relevant as far as attraction goes. The prefix means “all” or “every” in Greek.

Just like bisexuality, pansexuality is often dismissed as being a greedy or indecisive. This is not true, though. A pansexual is open to loving the person, no matter their sexuality or gender identification. As bisexuals are attracted to two sexes based on gender, pansexuals are effectively blind to gender and are attracted to others for reasons beyond it, such as emotions, personality and ideals. This is not to say that everyone else doesn’t find different qualities important, but pansexuals have a wider range of people with whom they may become attracted.

The term ‘pansexuality’ first came into use in the mid 90’s, but hasn’t been significantly searched for (on Google, for example) until about five years ago. This might be due to more recent generations being more in touch with themselves.

It can be difficult for pansexuals to know how to clearly define themselves. Some may choose ‘queer’ as a term that seems more inclusive, but it’s not exactly descriptive. It can be helpful if a celebrity decides to come out, but are they really practicing their assertion that they’re attracted to personality and not gender? It seems to be a more politically correct thing to say these days, but it’s damaging if it’s untrue. There are actually people (pansexuals) who feel this way. So, if a pansexual celebrity comes out as such, that’s great–if it’s true and not a publicity tactic.

Many pansexuals know how they differ from bisexuals; this can be a sore subject. It doesn’t seem appropriate for them to identify as bisexual when that means only including cisgender people. Rapper, Angel Haze (who has dated model Ireland Baldwin) says that for her: “love is boundary-less. If you can make me feel, if you can make me laugh… then I can be with you. I don’t care if you’re a hermaphrodite or whatever.” She says, “I’m not gay, I’m not straight, I’m not bisexual – I don’t care,” she says. “At the end of the day, I just want someone to connect with.”

Bisexual Women Have Higher Rates of Depression

Studies that survey the psychological health of lesbian, bisexual, and gay individuals have for years indicated that members of the LGB community struggle more with mental health issues such as depression, suicidality, alcoholism, and cigarette smoking.

Experts on psychological health accept that gay and bisexual individuals are not more impulsive than heterosexuals are. The reason for the high incidence of mental illness in LGB people is that simply having a sexual identity that is considered idiosyncratic places abnormal pressures on LGB people.

Gay and bisexual people may feel less of a sense of community, and the pressure to conform to gender roles may also contribute to the higher incidence of depression. Most surveys that have been done on psychological well-being and “outness” in the LGB community has shown that women, and in particular bisexual women, are more likely to have thoughts of suicide or chronic depression. The preponderance of the data suggests that women that have “come out of the closet” are actually less distressed and much less likely to struggle with thoughts of suicide than women that choose to keep their sexual orientation a secret. But the reasons for why bisexual women are far more likely than those of homosexual orientation to struggle with depression are unclear.

According to an article in the Desert Sun, bisexual women suffer from anxiety and depression at rates of 58.7% and 57.8%, which is more than 10% higher than the prevalence of these psychological issues reported by lesbians. The explanation for these numbers is that bisexual women feel less social support, but the article states that surveys of LGB members in California show that 75.3% of individuals surveyed feel that they have the necessary support. So what is responsible for the high rates of depression in bisexuals? It is not hard to fathom that bisexual women face stigmatization more often.

Gender roles are hard to escape, and while our society is becoming more understanding of homosexual relationships it is still difficult for women to express sexuality the way that men do.

Women are under more pressure to be chaste even in today’s world where media and popular culture frequently glorify gratuitous sex. Rather than liberate non-heterosexuals, our cultural ideals probably contribute more to confusion regarding the identity of bisexual women who are often mistaken for being promiscuous. Victimization by partners and peers is also a likely factor in the rate of depression in bisexual women, although there is little to indicate that bisexual women experience victimization more often than other members of the LGB community.

The fear of seeming indecisive or abnormal in a society where women are encouraged to provide stability at home and the ineptitude of our culture to grasp how a woman can have male and female partners without being promiscuous or “risky” is more to blame.

Bisexual women must seek ways of strengthening their identity and liberating themselves from the cultural misconstructions of female sexuality. The stigma that is felt by the LGB community is an ongoing quandary, and like all members of the LGB community bisexual women should acknowledge that their distress is a natural and warranted reaction to the pressure they are under to change.

2015

Gay Black Men’s Pressure to Conform Leads to Higher HIV Risk

Familial and cultural pressure to conform to expected masculine behaviors leads gay black men to engage in riskier behavior, therefore increasing their risk of contracting HIV. This is according to a report out of the John’s Hopkins Children’s Center and published in Science Daily. This community of men feel distress and social isolation, according to the report, which may contribute to their decision to take part in such behaviors. The “compensatory” behavior according to researchers leads to riskier behavior and contributes to the higher infection rate among gay black men.

Gay and bisexual black men attributed to 4,800 new HIV cases in 2010, more than two times that of other male groups, says the CDC. Thirty five young, male participants took part in this study, recently published in the American Journal of Public Health. Openly gay and bisexual men took part in this study, as did young men who have sexual relations with men but don’t self-identify as gay or bi-sexual, also known as MSM. Adolescent medicine expert at the John’s Hopkins Children’s Center and the study’s lead author, Errol Fields, M.D., Ph.D., said of this study, “HIV risk is the sum total of many factors, but social and family stress is a well-known driver of all types of risk-taking behaviors, and our findings clearly support the notion this also holds true when it comes to HIV risk.”

There is a very traditional view of masculinity with strong anti-gay sentiment in the community where the participants grew up. These participants needed to prove their masculinity, hide homosexuality, and conform to social pressures. This makes them far less likely to take part in monogamous relationships and more likely to take part in unprotected sex. Black gay men also sought affirmation through sex which they weren’t getting from a close loved one in their life. Some also said that having unprotected sex showed trust and love for one’s partner. Since the community they were from expected them to act aggressive and free of any feminine behaviors, they were forced to either conform or be ostracized. Drug use, drinking, fighting and other such risky behavior was taken part in so as to prove their masculinity and fit in.

According to Dr. Fields, “The findings of our study reveal a clear clash between internal sexual identity and external expectations at a critical developmental stage,” As a result, “This clash creates loneliness and low self-esteem and appears to drive these boys and men to risky behaviors, sexual and otherwise.” These young men were also constantly worried that they would be found out. If they were found out they would lose their friends and family, so they needed their secret to be safe. “It’s a true catch-22 for these youngsters,” said Fields. “On one hand, they are dealing with the chronic anxiety of hiding their homosexuality, but on the other they face the prospect of becoming social pariahs if they come out as gay or bisexual.”

Dr. M. Mirza – 2014
lgbt health wellness .com

Americans Identifying as LGBTI+ Increased

According to a recent survey from the Gallup research firm, 5.6 percent of Americans are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or intersex people. This significant increase, which means about 18 million people, is attributed to the greater acceptance of LGBTI+ individuals in the society.

While this rate was 4.5 percent in Gallup’s 2017 survey, the result from the 2020 survey indicates a record jump of 24 percent. The main reason for the increase is from Generation Z adults aged 18-23. 15.9 percent of this generation say they are LGBTI+.

“At a time when the public is increasingly promoting equal rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, ınterex + people, a growing percentage of Americans identify as LGBTI+,” the Gallup website said.

In the 2020 election, the US saw Pete Buttigieg as the first openly gay presidential candidate. LGBTI+ candidates have had multiple historic wins, including Sarah McBride, the first open transgender state senator.

According to the Washington-based research center Public Religion Research Institute, Americans’ support for same sex marriage, which was legalized in 2015 and seen largely as a synonym for LGBTI+ rights, rose from 36 percent in 2007 to 62 percent in 2020.

The Gallup survey shows that 54.6 percent of LGBTI+ Americans identify as bisexual, 24.5 percent are gay men, 11.7 percent are lesbians and 11.3 percent are transgender.

For the first survey conducted in 2012, 15,000 Americans were randomly interviewed by phone throughout 2020. While 86.7 percent of the respondents identified themselves as heterosexual, 7.6 percent refused to respond to the interviewers. This rate was around 5 percent in past surveys.

There were significant differences between generations. Among those born before 1946, seniors were much less likely to see themselves as LGBTI+. The lowest rate was recorded as 1.3 percent.

Researchers found that women were more likely to describe themselves as LGBTI+ than men. While this rate was 4.9 percent for men, it was 6.4 percent for women. From a political point of view, 13 percent of liberal respondents and 2.3 percent of conservatives identified themselves as LGBTI+.

It is noted that there is a similar trend in England. According to government data, the proportion of people identifying themselves as lesbian, gay or bisexual increased from 1.6 percent in 2016 to 2.2 percent in 2018.

Rainbow Tattoo Ideas

Although the Indians, Japanese, Native Americans and some tribes in Africa used the tattoo as an ornament, in many societies the tattoo was applied as a protective talisman (amulet) against illnesses and evil spirits, the position of the individual in society (slave, master, adolescent, worker, soldier) It is known to be used to emphasize.

The tradition of tattooing is quite old. It was understood from mummies that tattoos were used in ancient Egyptian society in the 2000s BC. Apart from the Egyptians, Britons, Gauls and Thracians also had tattoos. The ancient Greeks and Romans used to make tattoos on criminals and slaves, which they deemed “a barbarian occupation”. Tattoo was prohibited in the Christian faith. In contrast, the first Christians had tattoos on their bodies bearing the name of Jesus or a cross. Centuries passed, Europeans forgot about tattoos. They encountered tattoos again in American Indians and Polynesians on overseas trips in the late 18th century. European languages have taken the word tattoo, which means tattoo, from the Tahitian word tautau. Tattoo became widespread especially among sailors after the early 20th century. Tattoo was widely used to indicate romantic feelings, patriotism or piety, and is still used today.

Tattoos are also used by the LGBTI+, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex+ Community.

I’ve compiled some rainbow tattoos for you…

If you wanted to have a tattoo, which tattoo did you get? You can comment…

Homeless Shelter for LGBTI+ Opened in Naples, Italy

Friday, February 5, was an important day for the Neapolitan LGBTI+ community: The House of Cultures and Hospitality opened to host LGBTI+ people who are victims of discrimination, abuse and violence.

The municipality structure, whose address cannot be disclosed for security and protection reasons, is three-level and will be managed by Antinoo Arcigay Napoli and ten other partner associations.

Shelter; It will serve LGBTI + individuals who are exposed to violence, harassment, discrimination and exclusion.

Naples Mayor Luigi De Magistris said the municipal shelter is the only one of its kind in Italy.

“Today is an extraordinary day for rights, freedoms and justice,” said Luigi De Magistris.

De Magistris said, “This building is a sign of change. Our city believes in emotions, brotherhood, solidarity, justice and reaching out to people in need.”

The associations that will be responsible for the operation of the shelter stated that this project will strengthen their efforts to “protect civil rights in Italy and the Mediterranean”.

Antinoo Arcigay Napoli Association, which is involved in the project, also stated that the shelter will “host Covid victims as well as victims of intolerance and hate”.

The association drew attention to the fact that the coronavirus epidemic mainly affects the most vulnerable people.

Italy is in the last rank for LGBTI+ Rights

In Italy, the law granting same-sex couples legal status under the name of “civil partnership” was passed in 2016.

Although this decision is a historical turning point in the country where the Catholic Church has strong influence, Italy is still at the bottom of LGBTI+ rights among Western European countries.

According to a Eurobarometer survey conducted by European Union institutions in 2019, the acceptance rate of LGBTI+”Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, +” individuals in Italy and the proportion of those who say that same-sex couples should have the same rights as heterosexual couples is below the European average.